Mr. Nihilist
Mr. Nihilist
(NIHILIST EP /OTOR-003/2009)
Sakura Nozaki - Voice
Eric Jonson - Drums
Hideshi ‘heedey’ Omachi_Bass
Sam McIlvain – Guitar
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Feeling like I’m someone else…
We used to be one, though we are now two separate beings.
I’ve become happy, and you haven’t.
Mr. NIHILIST, don’t stare at me like that.
I don’t need your sympathy.
People tell me “you are so fortunate.”
One day I found out what my friends were up to.
They got good jobs and stable incomes.
I saw them shopping, dating, drinking and playing so I wanted more new clothes.
So first, I found a job, then got enough money to buy new clothes and car.
I got a little richer, so I wanted to buy more things.
As I started to chase my career,
my studio equipment got covered in dust.
Mr. NIHILIST walked away from me. That made me more than happy.
I stopped seeing things at an angle.
I became the constant smiler, which put everyone at ease.
I used to drink seltzer water against hunger, but now I don’t.
I do manicures listening to jazzy lounge music.
Feeling peaceful. Everything is going well.
I threw away Michel Foucault and read “MORE” instead.
Light comparisons, easy comparisons.
They simply put a special emphasis on my title and the money I make.
I wonder who cares about Darfur and Chechen.
What I care about now is how to get higher status and when to buy new clothes, new purses, new cars, rings, necklaces, bracelets, status, and this man who’s got three times more income than everyone.
Wait a minute, am I sure who everyone is?
Every single day I’m happy, so I’m bored.
I don’t feel like hitting anyone.
This must be so called stability and peace of mind.
Working to spend, living to be evaluated.
Then, there are the sorta-kinda nice guys I happen to see around.
I could sing like “I’m missing you” or “I need your love” and so on.
Mr. NIHILIST, everyone thinks you are a fool.
Making music like that, pressing vinyl in the CD age.
Mr. NIHILIST, my rose of passion had already withered long ago, stupid.
Found intolerable loneliness, hollow despair.
My wound is getting deeper day by day
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Translation by Courtney Fitzgerald and Sakura Nozaki